Tiger Piss

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This Tiger Pissed on Dad

Ok, Ok, I’ve got this hilarious story to tell you about what happened today.  You’re gonna like it, trust me.

I noticed that Mom and Dad were getting ready to go somewhere this morning and I wanted to go with them.  I was thinking….maybe the park, maybe the beach, maybe Polo like last week.  But no, they weren’t taking me with them.

Seems that the neighbors from Scotland are back in town.  Woohoo. They were going to breakfast then out for most of the day to who knows where.

Well, after breakfast they decided to visit the Big Cat Habitat and Gulf Coast Sanctuary in Sarasota. I’ve never been there and after what I learned today, I don’t know if I ever want to go there.

From what I understand you can see Bears, Tigers, Lions and various animals that have been rescued and now live out their lives in peace and comfort.  Did I mention Tigers?

Here’s where it gets funny.  First the neighbors, Mom, and Dad visit the bears.  Then the goats. Then the birds. Then a monkey or two. Then they come to the Tigers.  See the big guy pictured here?

Daddy took this picture and decided to Tweet it to his followers (@sarasotaadvisor).  While fiddling with his iphone and Twitter he wasn’t watching the Tiger. He didn’t see this big Tiger stand up, turn around, hike his rear into the air and SPRAY URINE all over Daddy. Of about six people standing there, Daddy got the full dose of tiger piss.  Yep.  All over his glasses, his face, his arms and his shirt!! ROFL.

That’s what he gets for not taking me with him.  I would’ve warned him.  Maybe.

When Mom and Dad got home.  Nothing was said.  Daddy sat down and leaned over to greet Jake and I.  Phew! What stench! It was revolting.

Then I heard the story.  The story of Tiger Piss. I still can’t stop laughing.

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Daddy Took Me to a Polo Match Yesterday

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Yesterday was a great day and lots of fun.  Daddy took me to a polo match at the Sarasota Polo Club in Lakewood Ranch, FL. It was my first ever Polo Match.

I never saw a horse before.  Those guys are huge and came thundering by from time to time. I didn’t pay them much attention though.  As usual I was focused on Daddy who was there with some of his Merrill Lynch clients.

Daddy brought one of my fetching toys and we enjoyed several bouts of fetch, my most favorite thing to do.  I also met some nice kids who were tailgating next to us. They gave me some hugs and played with me.  That was fun.

Polo was a lot of fun.  I saw a lot of other dogs of all shapes and sizes there.  Daddy said I was a good girl and he’d be happy to take me again.  Made my tail wag.

That’s where hamburger comes from?

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Daddy went to the Manatee County Fair this weekend cuz he wanted to see the steer auction. He said a client had a coulpe of grandsons who raised and showed steers.  One was called Double-stuff and the other was Kayla (the steer, not the grandsons).

What’s an auction, I wanted to know.

“That’s where they sell the steers to buyers.  They have them butchered and turned into hamburger, steaks, etc.”, said Daddy.

Oh my God. You gotta be kidding! That’s where hamburger comes from?

I’m sticking to chicken. It comes from a bag.

Chopper’s Mom had an operation

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Daddy works with Chopper’s mom.  (I didn’t have a picture of Chopper so I thought this pic appropriate.)

Anyway, Chopper is a mixed-breed according to Daddy and he lives with Bear and his Mom and Dad. Chopper’s mom was suffering with pains in her right side that increasingly grew worse.  Co-workers urged her to go to the hospital which she finally did.  Good thing too, because she had appendicitis. They operated and took it out (ouch).

Daddy says Chopper’s mom came through the operation OK and he hopes to see her back at work soon.

So, when you have a pain you better pay attention to it.  I’m sure Chopper would tell you the same, but I don’t think he has a blog.

Pooped Toy

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Pooped Raccoon

I think my toy Raccoon is too pooped to play. I seem to have that effect on my toys and even my Daddy.  I am a playoholoic.

There, I said it.  My name is Josey and I am a playaholic.  I am addicted.

They say the first step in recovery is admitting your addiction.  I say, bullpoop.  I don’t want to recover.  I want to play and I don’t care what anyone else thinks.

Soon my toy Raccoon will be all rested and ready for playtime.  I can’t wait.

Dead Duck

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I am the great “Black Hunter.”  I prowl the jungle in search of unsuspecting prey.  I smell the prey, stalk the prey, and then pounce upon it with all my might.  I struggle in a death match, knowing that only one will survive.

Who will it be?

Will I win or Lose?

It’s the survival of the fittest at its best!

Ultimately, with my keen skills, I prevail.  The prey succumbs to my prowess.

Now, it is time to relax and enjoy the spoils of victory!

Thanks for the Christmas duck!!

The Christmas Duck is Dead

Christmas Photo Doggy Style

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Christmas Doggystyle

Please allow me to woof you a Merry Christmas!!

–Love,

Josey

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